Friday, February 11, 2011

who wants to be right as rain?

Oops. How the hell did I let 3 months go by? Oh I know, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, Las Vegas, BCS Championship, and Penguin Awareness Day. Not kidding, I looked that last one up and it was January 20th. Good thing I know how to celebrate it right.

Anyway. It was an eventful Holiday season for me. I decided to go with my usual costume this Halloween and wore the same thing I wear everyday. Scrubs. How original, I know. But why the hell would I want to wear anything but pajamas when I have the option. And the douchebag dressed up as Richard Simmons has no idea that I wear them everyday, so whatevs. If I only could have gotten my flippers (haha, I laughed out loud when I typed that) on that penguin suit again...oh well.

Thanksgiving was spent at my grandparents in Hilton Head again (Benz update: still only in my dreams). We got there on Thanksgiving Day to a kitchen full of cooking. I think one good thing about my generation is that we don't get overly stressed out about having people (not family) over for dinner and needing everything to go perfectly. I've been to enough dinners to know that some one's gonna spill some wine and someone may put their shoes on the coffee table, but there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. I might as well enjoy the ride and laugh about as much as I can. Easier said than done, I know. The oldest generation of my family always seem to get really stressed out about this and lash out at others. Case in point: You know, Thanksgiving Day, watching football, having hors d'oeuvres with the family. Door bell rings, enter, neighbors. Let's just say this little scenario ended in anyone not born before 1980 being banned to another room, away from guests.
We were also given several subtle little hints about cell phones NOT being allowed at the dinner table. By several I mean 82, and by subtle, I mean "NO CELL PHONES AT DINNER, YOU KIDS CAN'T GO A SECOND WITHOUT LOOKING AT THEM" Well, I'm pretty sure if your phone had Angry Birds you'd be just as addicted was not the proper response to this statement, FYI. Lo and behold, we're all enjoying dinner and conversation and what not, and some one's cell phone rings. Grandma gives the death stare to each of us, who all hold up our hands to proclaim our innocence. Grandpa looks down, pulls his phone out of his pocket, and answers the call. EPIC I tell you. I've never laughed so hard in my life. Everyone did, that's one of the best things about my family. We're always laughing. Even after we're put in time out. But it was only a shadow of things to come. I'm pretty sure my siblings and cousins and I finally succeeded in scaring the beejeezus out of not only our grandparents but quite possibly our own parents this year. My excuse for my behavior is that Auburn was losing to Alabama by 24 points, and I was pissed. Not sure when I grew balls and began to care this much about college football, but alas I decided that watching the shiteous first half of that game in public was enough, and it was time pick up some beer and bring it on back to house so I could pout and sulk in private. We loaded all the "kids" in the minivan my parents rented for the trip and stopped by the gas station. My cousin and I walked out of there with well over 60 beers, two four lokos, a Styrofoam cooler (grandma's fridge could not handle this purchase due to the large quantities of leftovers) and a Sprite zero for my sister (wild child).
We got home, I think Auburn scored so my grandma told me to cheer up (same woman who asked me 3 hours earlier what Auburn's colors were, then asked me what Alabama's were, and came out ready to go wearing crimson and white...I'm so close to that Benz I can almost taste it. HA). The highlight of this evening was Auburn coming back to win and my whole family cheering them on, seriously, you'd think they all were lifelong Auburn fans, and not Tennessee, Yale, UConn, or Virginia fans pretending for crazy me. It also could have been me making my Grandpa sit in the other room because it was good luck if he didn't come out in the living room with everyone else, but I guess we'll never know.


Anyone who lives on a golf course knows this is HIGHLY illegal and frowned upon by the board...but SEVERAL beers later, no one really cared.

After that epic Holiday gathering, we move on to Christmas. I went up to my family's house on the 23rd and had to be back at work on the 27th. Thank you surgeons of America, heaven forbid you don't make that 2 mil mark this year, Scrooge. It is my oh so humble opinion that NO ONE should have to work the week between Christmas and New Years. Just a thought, current administration. Make it happen. Christmas was relatively uneventful, I made my other Grandma dress up in reindeer antlers and playing a ring toss game with her. Hey, at least there's never a dull moment.

Well, I'm sick of typing already, I think I'll save New Years and the BCS Championship for next time...