Wednesday, May 19, 2010

my car hates me...

I know it's been a little while since my last little post, but I've been busy driving my car from Atlanta to Tennessee back to Atlanta then to Jasper, AL to Atlanta to Charlotte and once again back to Atlanta. All in one week. Needless to say I will not be going on any road trips in the near future. (unless its to the beach...even I have limits).
Now, on to Jasper. I'm going to go ahead an apologize if anyone I know is from this town or knows people from this town. But seriously. The things I saw I just can't begin to even make up. Exhibit A: I'm sitting in the lobby enjoying my third vanilla latte (double shot) of the day and see this snaggle-toothed woman with ridiculously short shorts and a rather colorful t-shirt. Me being me, I decide to see what exactly is so important that she would want to broadcast it on her t-shirt (obviously homemade). Word-for-word "Southern Belles love them some Country Boys." huh? what? why? why? why? I mean if you're going to make a statement like that can we at least use correct grammar? Of course not. So this little treasure (side note, she had on high topped white shoes with stickers from the University of Alabama on them, not embroidered....stickers) decides she wants a beverage from the vending machine. She removes a wrinkled dollar bill from her bra and inserts it into the machine which promptly spits it back out at her at least 5 times. She starts to get visibly angry and punches the machine while yelling something along the lines of "gawwwd durnit gimme a friggin' mowtan deeeewwwww you friggin' piece of..." At this point, I'm too annoyed by the fact that my phone had NO service to really grasp the amazingness I was witnessing or to document it via iPhone pictures like I usually do, so my apologies. After she tries another few dollar bills with no luck she reaches down in her sock and pulls out a few quarters..OF COURSE. Why didn't I think of that? As the machine starts to dispense her drink of choice she's visibly sweating and angry about the ordeal when all of a sudden she finds herself in possession of a DIET Mountain Dew, not a regular. You would think someone had kicked her cat. She continues to slap the machine and took the time to scribble down the complaint hotline number all the while cursing with such anger that spit is flying everywhere. (where she got that pen, I don't even want to know).

I was also lucky enough to witness one of those Jesus's face in a grilled cheese sort of things. There's a door in the hospital with some plexi-glass over it that I walked past several times during the day but never stopped to look at. Later in the afternoon it caught my eye and I was fascinated by the story. A man's son was in critical condition and he was staring at this door when he realized he saw a face staring back at him which gave him hope his son would be okay and his son was hoooorayyyyyyyyy. Enough people must have thought it was the face of Jesus because its now covered in plexi-glass and has a plaque next to it explaining the story. The picture is below, you be the judge.

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